Last fall our Antioch Orphan Care Team had this crazy little idea to host a seminar/conference on orphan care and adoption. At the time, it seemed like a wild dream. Last Saturday it came true.
With over 100 people in attendance, we were all blown away by what God had done with our meager obedience!
And the news came. Which is nice. Except what I said and what they said don't really go together in, ya know, a "story", and they didn't even mention the AMAZING organization that we partnered with to put this shindig on - the Orphan Care Alliance. That is how to get involved in Louisville people. They are what I was talking about. In case you saw it and were wondering...
Why can't I embed this video!?
Big changes are coming to the blog (maybe even tomorrow!) and I'm
planning to include resources for churches interested in doing orphan
care.
We certainly don't have it all figured out, and we
have a whole six months of experience of doing orphan care as a church, but it was so encouraging to meet
folks from other churches who want to be obedient. I'd like for our
blog to be a resource for them too. Not everyone is called to adopt. I
get it. (Didn't say I like it.:-)
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Sunday, January 29, 2012
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Thursday, January 19, 2012
Waiting: Month 2
It has been two months since we saw our sweet little man's face for the first time. The update is...
that there is no update. We are still waiting on the same two documents needed before we can file for court in the DRC.
The time frame we were given for getting these documents was two months so we are not really behind schedule yet. Since we received our referral 10 days before the elections, which led to people fleeing Kinshasa, riot police, the embassy shutting down, etc. it may take a bit longer than expected. But that's ok. Riot police = grace.
The Congo Lady (aka our case worker) will be in Uganda until next Thursday so we are in the middle of a communication blackout. No updates. It sucks.
Our prayer is this: when she gets back in the office next week, we'll hear that, not only is the paperwork in the hands of our attorney, but we also have a pending court date. That seems like a lot to ask for but remember Meadow's brain calcifcations? God can handle it.
I've been taking my prayer cues from the persistent widow lately. Yes, I know she was not a real person but I have much to learn from this parable Jesus told to his disciples.
"And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought to always pray and not loose heart... And the Lord said, 'Hear what the unrighteous judge says. And will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long over them? I tell you, he will give justice to them speedily.'"
that there is no update. We are still waiting on the same two documents needed before we can file for court in the DRC.
The time frame we were given for getting these documents was two months so we are not really behind schedule yet. Since we received our referral 10 days before the elections, which led to people fleeing Kinshasa, riot police, the embassy shutting down, etc. it may take a bit longer than expected. But that's ok. Riot police = grace.
The Congo Lady (aka our case worker) will be in Uganda until next Thursday so we are in the middle of a communication blackout. No updates. It sucks.
Our prayer is this: when she gets back in the office next week, we'll hear that, not only is the paperwork in the hands of our attorney, but we also have a pending court date. That seems like a lot to ask for but remember Meadow's brain calcifcations? God can handle it.
I've been taking my prayer cues from the persistent widow lately. Yes, I know she was not a real person but I have much to learn from this parable Jesus told to his disciples.
"And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought to always pray and not loose heart... And the Lord said, 'Hear what the unrighteous judge says. And will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long over them? I tell you, he will give justice to them speedily.'"
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Why I Cried My Mascara Off
Anytime I hear a sermon about adoption, or one where adoption is mentioned, or a story about adoption or sometimes just the word adoption - I get teary eyed. I'm not a crier or even an emotional person but mention the "A" word and I will probably tear up.
What happened Sunday night was not tearing up. It was floodgates exploding through my tear ducts.
Sunday was "Sanctity of Life" day which, to be honest, as someone who did not grow up in the church, I had never heard of before. The main point I left with is that "how I value the life in front of me that is hurting and in need says something about how I feel about the sanctity of life."
"Sanctity of Life" is not about a single issue. Not when it's about the hurting and need that is right in front of me. It's about lots of issues. And it effects us every day. I didn't make any decisions today that dealt with abortion, but I was short with a co-worker. I didn't make any decisions today that dealt directly with the poor, but I drove right past an elderly man riding his wheelchair down the street in the rain.
If I am supposed to be God's vessel in this fallen world for taking salvation to the lost, then those decisions do affect the sanctity of those lives. Inasmuch as I can be obedient in them. And they say something to the rest of the world about how I feel about life and the One who gives it.
"As God's people, we must respond to the soul's in front of us with Gospel love, grace, and truth."
The needs are immense, crippling even. But God has a plan. It is us, His people. There is no Plan B.
We. Are. It.
Reason #1 of why I cried my mascara off: We are so blessed to be a part of Antioch Church. Unbelievably blessed. I started crying literal tears of joy as these applications of the scripture (Job 10:8-12) came across the screen:
We need to learn what God's word says.
We need to learn the needs and opportunities.
Pray.
Advocate.
Adopt.
And when I heard our pastor say: "There is a great need and it demands something of us." and, when speaking of orphan statistics and adoption "We've got to be willing to take risks... We've got to figure out what this means for us." I wept. Blubbering, sobbing, mascara all over your face wept.
Because I needed to hear that. I needed affirmation. (Reason #2 that I cried my mascara off) As we learn more about ourson's referral's son's life in the DRC and we read more books and learn more statistics and talk to more professionals - I've become downright discouraged. And scared. And I needed someone to remind me that it is hard and it will be hard but we must be willing to take risks. Not to be courageous or cute with our multi-colored family but because we believe that God is bigger than poverty and institutions and abuse and neglect and what experts and statistics have to say about adopting out of birth order.
I mean no disrespect, but the healing and redemptive power of the Gospel IS bigger than all of those things. And His word says to care for those who cannot care for themselves. To bring them justice and plead their cause.
But the weight of those things, of the needs, it is heavy. So during worship after the service, I sat in the pew, head on my knees and just cried at the weight of it all. (Reason #3 I cried my mascara off) It was like I could feel it. All the heaviness, the brokenness, the sin, inside my chest. The burden of 143 million orphans, 26,000 starving children, the poor, widows, disease, abuse, neglect...
I could feel it like this:
There is no insightful resolution to all of this. I just needed to get it out. All I can say in closing is: Here am I. Use me.
What happened Sunday night was not tearing up. It was floodgates exploding through my tear ducts.
Sunday was "Sanctity of Life" day which, to be honest, as someone who did not grow up in the church, I had never heard of before. The main point I left with is that "how I value the life in front of me that is hurting and in need says something about how I feel about the sanctity of life."
"Sanctity of Life" is not about a single issue. Not when it's about the hurting and need that is right in front of me. It's about lots of issues. And it effects us every day. I didn't make any decisions today that dealt with abortion, but I was short with a co-worker. I didn't make any decisions today that dealt directly with the poor, but I drove right past an elderly man riding his wheelchair down the street in the rain.
If I am supposed to be God's vessel in this fallen world for taking salvation to the lost, then those decisions do affect the sanctity of those lives. Inasmuch as I can be obedient in them. And they say something to the rest of the world about how I feel about life and the One who gives it.
"As God's people, we must respond to the soul's in front of us with Gospel love, grace, and truth."
The needs are immense, crippling even. But God has a plan. It is us, His people. There is no Plan B.
We. Are. It.
Reason #1 of why I cried my mascara off: We are so blessed to be a part of Antioch Church. Unbelievably blessed. I started crying literal tears of joy as these applications of the scripture (Job 10:8-12) came across the screen:
We need to learn what God's word says.
We need to learn the needs and opportunities.
Pray.
Advocate.
Adopt.
And when I heard our pastor say: "There is a great need and it demands something of us." and, when speaking of orphan statistics and adoption "We've got to be willing to take risks... We've got to figure out what this means for us." I wept. Blubbering, sobbing, mascara all over your face wept.
Because I needed to hear that. I needed affirmation. (Reason #2 that I cried my mascara off) As we learn more about our
I mean no disrespect, but the healing and redemptive power of the Gospel IS bigger than all of those things. And His word says to care for those who cannot care for themselves. To bring them justice and plead their cause.
But the weight of those things, of the needs, it is heavy. So during worship after the service, I sat in the pew, head on my knees and just cried at the weight of it all. (Reason #3 I cried my mascara off) It was like I could feel it. All the heaviness, the brokenness, the sin, inside my chest. The burden of 143 million orphans, 26,000 starving children, the poor, widows, disease, abuse, neglect...
I could feel it like this:
There is no insightful resolution to all of this. I just needed to get it out. All I can say in closing is: Here am I. Use me.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Fundraising For the Rest of Us: Part 2
So last week was Part 1 of Fundraising For the Rest of Us where I shared our ideas and experiences with fund raisers, events, selling stuff, etc.
As I said in Part 1, my goal is to give ideas and encourage others - It can be done! You can raise an astronomical amount of money that you never thought possible! (Even those of us who don't get anonymous $10,000 checks in our mailboxes.)
There are basically two routes you can take to raise funds for your adoption:
1. Fundraisers, Events, Etc.
2. Grants and Loans
Below is a list of grants and loans I've compiled over the last 3 years. It is not all inclusive by any means, and it's not pretty because it's been edited so many times, but the links should take you where you need to go and keep you busy for a while!
What did I miss? I know there are others... Please share!
As I said in Part 1, my goal is to give ideas and encourage others - It can be done! You can raise an astronomical amount of money that you never thought possible! (Even those of us who don't get anonymous $10,000 checks in our mailboxes.)
There are basically two routes you can take to raise funds for your adoption:
1. Fundraisers, Events, Etc.
2. Grants and Loans
Below is a list of grants and loans I've compiled over the last 3 years. It is not all inclusive by any means, and it's not pretty because it's been edited so many times, but the links should take you where you need to go and keep you busy for a while!
GRANTS
http://www.achildwaits.org/Grant%20Program.htm
– special needs or over the age of 5
http://www.intlcare.org/ICARE.htm
www.giftofadoption.org - $40 application fee
www.ggam.org - For families with an income of $60,000 or less
www.goldendawnaa.org - For kids with special needs and/or that are "hard to place"
www.handinhandadopt.org - Matching grant
www.helpusadopt.org - Priority given to couples without children
www.hiskidstoo.org - International only, will help generate funds not a true grant
www.lydiafund.org - International only
www.seaoffaces.org - $15 donation
www.micahfund.org - For the adoption of black and bi-racial Americans in Minnesota
LOANS
https://www.adoptioncouncil.org/resources/fianance_adoption.html
http://www.lifesongfororphans.org/adGrantLoans.htmlWhat did I miss? I know there are others... Please share!
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Fundraising For the Rest of Us: Part 1
If you've been following along for any length of time, you know that I'm not shy about talking adoption finances. (or much else really) Since we've completed our first few fundraisers now seems like a good time for a couple posts on the subject. My goal here is to give ideas and encourage others - It can be done! You can raise an astronomical amount of money that you never thought possible! (Even those of us who don't get anonymous $10,000 checks in our mailboxes.)
There are basically two routes you can take to raise funds for your adoption:
1. Fundraisers, Events, Etc.
2. Grants and Loans
This first post will address fundraisers, the funner (pun intended) method of raising money.
If you're looking for a good book on this topic check out Julie Gumm's "Adopt Without Debt". If you want to know my thoughts, read on!
Here's a list of fundraisers we've done/have in the works and the results:
There are basically two routes you can take to raise funds for your adoption:
1. Fundraisers, Events, Etc.
2. Grants and Loans
This first post will address fundraisers, the funner (pun intended) method of raising money.
If you're looking for a good book on this topic check out Julie Gumm's "Adopt Without Debt". If you want to know my thoughts, read on!
Here's a list of fundraisers we've done/have in the works and the results:
- Yard Sales - The old standby. Everyone has junk that someone else wants. Some folks have lots of success with yard sales. We are not those folks. I've heard of people raising 3 grand or more. I like to shop at yard sales but not have them. We've had two and each raised between $300 - $400. If we had put more into it I'm sure we would've gotten more out but it's just not my thing.
The second yard sale we had was a "Donations" sale meaning nothing was priced. We explained to people the purpose of the sale and then told them they could give us what they thought was fair. There were some interesting moral dilemma's going on that day. Some people did not like it at all. Others were curious. It would have made an interesting psychological research experiment. What I learned is this: white people are a cheaper bunch than most. - Jewelry Parties - I think this is a great idea for anyone adopting from Africa. Of course you can adapt it and sell other items from the country/region you are adopting from as well. We were super blessed by a friend who purchased hundreds of pieces of rolled paper bead jewelry on a trip to Sudan. His intent was to use it to fund raise for his non-profit but that didn't pan out so he GAVE it to us.
We also purchased additional and different style pieces from Outreach Uganda. They sell the jewelry to adopting families at a 40% discount and then you can sell it for however much you want. I've researched every possible jewelry vendor I could find and Outreach Uganda is by far the best. They have the best selection, price and quality. And I'm not getting anything to say that!
In all we raised over $4,000 from the jewelry. It FAR exceeded our expectations. I think it was successful for us for a few reasons: timing, affordability, parties. We started selling the jewelry in September but had the majority of our parties in October and November when people were starting to purchase Christmas gifts. We priced our jewelry affordably so people could... afford it. We still made a big profit because most of it was donated to us. The parties were huge in scope because they allowed us to reach an audience outside our inner circle. We realized pretty early on that we would tap them out pretty quickly and this allowed them to support our adoption in a non-financial way.
- T-Shirts - This is not a new or unique idea. There are lots of organizations that have t-shirts (Show Hope, 147 Million Orphans just to name a couple) and will let you buy/sell them for your adoption but they are getting a cut of your money. We preferred to do the work ourselves, have a personal shirt and get the profit. William designed our shirts and we had them screen printed locally. Unfortunately I cannot recommend the company we used. We did take pre-orders for the shirts to get an idea of which colors and sizes would be most popular and to make sure our close family and friends got the size/color they wanted. We then ordered double (maybe triple?) the number that were pre-ordered. In all we ended up with 148 shirts. We still have a LOT of kids shirts left, they are not as popular.
We had our design printed on American Apparel shirts because we didn't want to support a sweatshop that is using vulnerable kids to make their shirts that we would then turn around and sell to bring a vulnerable kid home... They are a couple dollars more per shirt but well worth it. We made about $1,000 from selling the shirts.
We have realized since starting the t-shirt selling that only people who know you are going to buy your shirt (for the most part). Everyone has dozens of t-shirts in their closet already so it's not something unique that they will want to purchase, or an item that people are in need of - they are doing it because they love you and want your kid to come home. And they secretly want you to stop selling stuff and asking for money all the time.
- Christmas Ornaments - So in September, maybe even August, my good friend Rebekah asked if she could make some ornaments for us to sell at our first art show that was coming up. Her theory was this: she and her husband could donate $50 to our adoption fund or she could design an ornament, buy supplies with the $50 and turn some kind of profit thus getting more than $50 into our fund. I think I can safely say that she had NO IDEA what she was getting into.
First of all, she is super talented and the ornaments were amazing. We sold out of the 48 she made very quickly. The plan was for Rebekah to show me how to make them so we could continue the ornament selling through Christmas. At one point I emailed a friend who had a great ornament fundraiser a couple years ago to kinda complaining about not having the connections that they did, and people just aren't buying our ornaments online, wah, wah, wah.
People, be careful what you ask for. Or, in my case, whine about.
One Tuesday afternoon in mid-November I was in Bloomington visiting my sister. I checked my email before heading home and had received 4 or 5 Etsy orders in less than an hour. I told my sister how strange it was since it was more than we had in the last few months. She made a comment about Christmas coming soon and people starting to buy Christmas stuff... By the time I went to bed that night we had received over a dozen orders. I checked the next morning - over a dozen more. Crazy! I couldn't figure it out.
I posted on Facebook about the Etsy shop ornament craziness and a couple friends commented that they saw the ornament on Pinterest. "Ya," I thought "But I pinned it to my board weeks ago. Of course you saw it." It wasn't until the following day, and over 50 orders later, that someone told me that no you idiot it was on the Pinterest HOMEPAGE. Oh! Hallelujah, God is sovereign over Pinterest! (Was there ever any doubt?)
So the blur that was the end of November and all of December began. I made ornaments every waking minute. We had ornament making parties. I took ornament supplies to a bar so that I could have a drink with my pals and make ornaments at the same time. (That is not a joke, it really happened.) I overnighted ornaments on December 23rd. It was intense. We made well over 300 ornaments at $10 a pop. The supplies cost less than $2 per ornament and people paid their own shipping so we made around $3,000 from an idea from a sweet friend just trying to make the most she could with 50 bucks. God is so good.
- Parents Day Out - Some friends of ours did this for us and it was a great idea. They offered to watch our friends kids one Saturday afternoon for 3 hours so the parents could have a "day" out, or in our case, go Christmas shopping for a few hours. The parents donated money for the childcare that went into our adoption fund. This contributed close to $200 to bringing our little man home!
- Self Defense Seminar - This is just one example of how your friends and family can contribute without actually giving you money. Just like the ornament and parents day out ideas, people who want to support you can use their talents and ideas to multiply what they could give or do on their own. My dad teaches karate and woman's self defense. Next month, our church is going to host a woman's self defense seminar that my dad will teach for a suggested donation of $25. The great thing about other people utilizing their talents and ideas is that it usually requires very little of your time and mental energy. This is good.
- Lifesong for Orphans Both Hands Project - The
organization sponsoring this project is called the Both Hands Foundation and here’s
how it works: we find a widow in need of home repairs. We assemble a team of
our friends. Then the team (including us) will send letters out to family and
friends asking for sponsors for the day of our project: when the team works on
the widow’s home. All of the sponsorship funds go toward our adoption. (And are
tax deductible)
It’s just like asking someone to sponsor you for a 5K or a golf scramble.The idea has been replicated successfully over 100 times all around the country! Here is a link to a video that might help give you a better idea of what the Both Hands Project is all about. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98PD-O97N3IWe are planning our project for March of this year. Our prayer is that the project will raise the remaining $16,000-ish needed to bring our little man home. If you are reading this and we have not invited you to participate on our team and you're thinking "Wow, I'd really like to be on the Wallace Both Hands Team." let me know.So that's what we've done and plan on doing. Here are a few things I've heard of other people doing: Photo shoots by photographer friends (one day of shoots, 45 minutes each, money raised goes toward adoption fund), haircuts by stylist friends (same as photography idea), any other skill your friend has that can be "donated", raffle off adoption goodies, use your skills to raise some extra money like this family did. Gobena Coffee.What did I miss? There are as many ideas as there are kids who need homes!
Sunday, January 1, 2012
The Ultimate Resolution
In early December I received an intriguing little book in the mail titled "The 10 Second Rule." The tag line of this book by Clare De Graaf is "Just do the next thing you're reasonably certain Jesus wants you to do." While I was intrigued, I was in over my head with Etsy orders, jewelry parties, orphan care ministry and a long list of other commitments. I didn't have time to read about the next thing Jesus wanted me to do because I had to take care of my own to do list first. Sound familiar?
I finally got around to reading it this past week and I've decided that the 10-Second Rule is the ultimate resolution. The book itself is a quick (under 200 pages) fairly light read. What stood out to me most is that the rule sounds so simple. Just do the next thing you're reasonably certain Jesus wants you to do. That doesn't sound like a huge commitment.
But the simplicity of the rule stood out because it's where I oftentimes fail. With the simple. The small. The seemingly unnoticed tasks that add up to an entire day or week or month of following my own agenda. As De Graaf explains "The purpose of obeying the 10-Second Rule is to help us develop these habits of obedience, beginning with the small things."
For some reason, I have a hard (maybe even harder?) time with the small things. Maybe it's because being obedient with the "little" isn't as fun or flashy as being obedient with the "much."
The words of De Graaf in Chapter 8 felt like a dagger impaling me in the chest: "However, followers of Jesus ought to be wary of showing measured mercy - mercy that's portioned out only as time or convenience allows. We call that volunteering - a very good thing. But it's not the same as spontaneous obedience."
Volunteering. Spontaneous obedience. Not the same.
I do a lot of volunteering for Jesus. Which doesn't sound so bad until it's defined as measured mercy. Ouch.
Another aspect of the rule that makes it the ultimate resolution is that it's a complete surrender of control. It's not me saying I'm going to focus on A, B and C. Even if A, B, and C are good Godly things, they're still my agenda. I'm not saying making my own resolutions would be bad. I'm saying that if God wants me to get in shape, blog twice a week, get out of debt or read one book a month He's going to put the small steps in front of me that will lead down that path.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interest, but also to the inerests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality woth God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. - Phillipians 2:3-7
My prayer for this year, is that by His grace, I would just do the next thing I'm resonably ceretain Jesus wants me to do. No matter how small it may seem.
I finally got around to reading it this past week and I've decided that the 10-Second Rule is the ultimate resolution. The book itself is a quick (under 200 pages) fairly light read. What stood out to me most is that the rule sounds so simple. Just do the next thing you're reasonably certain Jesus wants you to do. That doesn't sound like a huge commitment.
But the simplicity of the rule stood out because it's where I oftentimes fail. With the simple. The small. The seemingly unnoticed tasks that add up to an entire day or week or month of following my own agenda. As De Graaf explains "The purpose of obeying the 10-Second Rule is to help us develop these habits of obedience, beginning with the small things."
For some reason, I have a hard (maybe even harder?) time with the small things. Maybe it's because being obedient with the "little" isn't as fun or flashy as being obedient with the "much."
The words of De Graaf in Chapter 8 felt like a dagger impaling me in the chest: "However, followers of Jesus ought to be wary of showing measured mercy - mercy that's portioned out only as time or convenience allows. We call that volunteering - a very good thing. But it's not the same as spontaneous obedience."
Volunteering. Spontaneous obedience. Not the same.
I do a lot of volunteering for Jesus. Which doesn't sound so bad until it's defined as measured mercy. Ouch.
Another aspect of the rule that makes it the ultimate resolution is that it's a complete surrender of control. It's not me saying I'm going to focus on A, B and C. Even if A, B, and C are good Godly things, they're still my agenda. I'm not saying making my own resolutions would be bad. I'm saying that if God wants me to get in shape, blog twice a week, get out of debt or read one book a month He's going to put the small steps in front of me that will lead down that path.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interest, but also to the inerests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality woth God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. - Phillipians 2:3-7
My prayer for this year, is that by His grace, I would just do the next thing I'm resonably ceretain Jesus wants me to do. No matter how small it may seem.
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