July Martini

A few of the bloggers I follow post an end of the month "here's what my family did this month" type post. I thought it might be a nice way for me to recap and remember all of the blessings of the month. (and show off my cute kids!)

These end of the month posts will be named the "martini". Since William and I both have film backgrounds (I guess he has a film foreground also...), we throw around some film slang from time to time. It's kinda like a secret code that no one else understands unless you are on a film set.

The "martini" is the name of the last shot of the day. To most people, that doesn't sound like a big deal, but when you have been on your feet for 14 or 16 or 22 hours, are sweatier than you have ever been in your life and only get 5 hours of sleep a night, the last shot of the day is something to get excited about. According to wikipedia it is called the martini because "the next shot is out of a glass", referring to a post-wrap drink, which is appropriate because I just might be having a drink myself right now;-)

So these martini posts will also likely include lots of pictures because, if it weren't for my camera, I would have no idea what happened in the last month.

Blueberries! - we went blueberry picking with our good friend and old nanny Stephanie. It was actually a lot of fun and we stopped for ice cream afterwards. I think the kids ate 2 pounds of blueberries in two days. The bucket on the table is a tradition my step-mom starting that I am keeping up. Blueberries on the table meant summertime in our house.

William and I are helping to head up an Orphan Care Ministry at our church, Antioch. We had our first meeting in July and it was so encouraging. We are really looking forward to seeing how God will use this ministry. No pictures of the meeting but it was very exciting!

Moses slept through our entire Costco trip. The trip does happen once a month but is not usually newsworthy, I just really wanted to share this picture.

Puddle jumping in the rain AND sunshine.

Our praying mantis' finally hatched! This was a super exciting day!

My mom gave Moses a nest for his birthday and he had been checking those things daily and... nothing. Until, all of the sudden, there were hundreds. My mom told me this would happen but it was pretty wild to see. She also gave me a handout on how to care for said mantis' but since they weren't here yet, I hadn't read it. So when they hatched I pulled out the handout and read something along the lines of "if you don't feed them tiny insects THEY WILL EAT EACH OTHER". Holy crap. This sent me into a panic. The thought of a.) having to feed hundreds of tiny living creatures (and plan another trip to the store, and spend more money on food, and prepare their food... Meal planning for hundreds? I don't think so!) or b.) them eating each other alive in front of my children really freaked me out. So we marched them right outside and let them all go in the garden. Which seemed like a good solution until William came home from work and wasn't too happy that he hadn't gotten to experience the mantis fun. Oops.

Wheelie bug fun! This is the closest to in focus I could get of the two of them. This is something to be thankful for. If I were still working full time I wouldn't have gotten to capture this one.

Our church sponsored an awesome week of kids fun in the evenings for the neighborhood. It was a great way to meet some of the families living in our neighborhood. Check out homeboy on the tarp - he is loving it. 

These are a few of our friends that we hadn't seen in awhile. They really liked pushing around the stroller (and other than knocking over a speaker, did a good job of maneuvering it) but as soon as I pull out the camera - the smiles disappear. Every. Time.

Meadow has somehow interpreted "smile" to mean "say ahhh". It's funny. And cute.

Our garden is in full swing and we are enjoying it. It's a total experiment this year. The pesto pizza was yummy!

Random. Cuteness.

On the adoption front, we spent a lot of time working on our home study update and new dossier in July. I know this is not the "right" way to feel about it, but I am almost afraid to blog anything adoption related because I don't want to have to come back later and say something about how it didn't go the way we thought or the way it should have. 

I'd rather wait until we move off the dime and can say "look, now we are waiting on something we've never waited on before!" So, all that to say, other than our updated home study and CIS extension, our dossier is ready. For the third time. I'm becoming a pro at the paper chase.

The clock is ticking on our CIS deadline and I will do an adoption update in the next couple weeks. Hopefully I'll be able to say something new! 

Raising Children with a Heart for Orphans

I'm super excited about tonight's post! (but my computer is being super slow and funky so there are some weird font issues and not everything is linked. Oh well.) I'll be sharing with you some amazing ideas I gleaned from a session at the Christian Alliance for Orphans Summit in April.

The entire conference was amazing, and helped me launch the new focus of our blog, in addition to our family mission. By far, my favorite sessions were about being a mama and advocating for orphans at the same time. For some reason I couldn't figure out the two being one on my own...

BUT, thankfully I got to hear Lisa Kjeldgaard speak on the topic of Raising Children with a Heart for Orphans. And I was inspired. 

Lisa's story is one that I think a lot of us mama's can relate to. Since the age of 16, she wanted to be a missionary in Africa. She also assumed that one day she would adopt babes from Africa. She got sidetracked from her dreams after college (ahem, husband) and now has Eight. Very. White. Kiddos. (ok - so maybe we can't all relate to that 8 kids part!)

Her husband tells the story on their blog: "In 2007 we decided that our comfy life in suburbia needed re-prioritizing.  Lisa and I purposed to find a way to take our children overseas and until we found that way, we would work to help children and more specifically orphans and the impoverished, while we stayed in little old Oakdale waiting for our turn."

And man have they worked. Eric again:

"God blessed us with a family verse, James 1:27, “Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.”   From this verse we created the first Riverbend Ranch Charity Carnival and with the help of our family and friends raised over $8,000 for Acres of Hope, an orphanage based in Liberia.  Since 2007 we have raised over $65,000 that has been given to worthy ministries serving orphans and widows."

Wow.

It gets better. In December they will be leaving for Kenya. With their kids. All eight of them. For 11 months.

Now I know that some of you out there just breathed a sigh of relief. It can be done! With kids! I can be a missionary and a mama at the same time! I don't have to wait 25 years! It nearly makes me cry. (Thanks Lisa for setting this example for all of us who have felt as though we have gotten a little sidetracked.)

So that part of Lisa's story is awesome and inspiring but, let's face it, most of us will not become missionaries. What really challenged me from Lisa's session is that she is raising her children to have a heart for orphans. And the ripple effect of that is so huge.

Below are my notes from Lisa's sessions. I know this is a long post but I promise you will be blessed by what she has to say.  Please also follow Lisa's blog as they prepare for their move to Kenya at http://ten2kenya.wordpress.com/

Deut. 6:7 – “You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

                It is our responsibility to pass God’s heart onto our children. We have to be intentional.            

We pass our vision onto our children in two ways:

1.       Vision casting

2.       Practical training

VISION CASTING

                Begin with scripture – there are 5 things God’s word tells us about caring for the poor.  Even young children can count to five on their fingers and memorize these 5 things!

(Lisa makes the point that anywhere in scripture God talks about the poor, the orphans are included in that general description)

1.       God is concerned. (Psalm 140:12)

2.       God identifies Himself with the poor (Proverbs 14:31)

3.       God commands us to act. (Isaiah 1:17)

4.       Go blesses those who serve. (Proverbs 19:17)

5.       God punishes those who ignore orphans. (Jeremiah 5:28)

Ways to cast vision:

                Reading aloud – Lisa does circle time every day with ALL of her kids. It's her time to share with them. Examples of books/publishers listed below
                Speakers/conferences – well behaved children would be welcome at many
                Blogs – follow blogs with your children that show waiting children, children in orphanages, etc.
                Hospitality – have missionaries to your home and ask them to share with your family their stories
                Live a life of prayer:
                                card box with pics of missionaries, waiting children photos, family, friends
                                Binder with pics of missionaries, waiting children photos, family, friends
                                Maps – world map on wall with pins where missionaries we know are serving or where our sponsored kids are living
                                Clocks – set to times where missionaries or sponsored kids are living

                Live a service oriented life – make meals for others, bags for the homeless to keep in car, foster children, sponsor a child, volunteer in a soup kitchen, etc.

What you spend your time doing will characterize your family – your children will pick up on this.

PRACTICAL TRAINING   

1.       Public speaking – teach your children to become comfortable with public speaking so that they can be a voice for those who are not heard – memorize scripture, have them stand up in  front of the family and ask them questions, let them interview each other, etc.

2.      

3.       Ministry Experience – There are places you can serve with kids – you just have to look hard enough. Food banks, pregnancy centers, compassion international, family mission trips (more info below), etc.

RESOURCES:

Read Alouds: YWAM publishing, Winter’s Promise – Children Around the World book list – www.winterpromise.com

Encouragement: www.onemillionarrows.com

Family Mission Trips: www.agapechildren.org

Lisa’s Family: www.ten2kenya.com, www.carnivalforcharity.com

Sponsorships 101

Perhaps the easiest and quickest way to make a difference in the life of an orphan is to sponsor one. Sponsorships provide life-saving financial support to children and families in need. It works like this: You are matched with a child and given a picture and a brief bit of info on them. Here's what we received on our guy:

You make a monthly contribution towards the care of that child. Most sponsorships range from $30 - $45 per month. The sponsorship funds cover basic needs - food, clothing, shelter, schooling, etc. Without sponsorships, most organizations would not be able to care for the number of children that they do. A couple of our favorite orgs that offer sponsorships are Harvester's Reaching the Nations (HRTN) and Compassion International.

HRTN has two orphanages in the Republic of South Sudan (shout out to the world's newest nation!!). One in Yei and the other in Terekeka. They have over 180 children in their care and few of them are fully sponsored. Check them out here!

Compassion has children in need of sponsorships all over the world. They have a really cool search feature on their website. You can search for kids by country, gender, birth date and more. I know many families who sponsor kids that are the same gender and age as their own kids. This is a really great way to teach your kids about orphan care!

Moses "sponsors" a 6 year old boy named Kenyi. We pray for Kenyi, write letters and color pictures for him. We talk about his life. Moses knows that Kenyi doesn't have a mommy or a papa and that we help take care of him. He knows that Kenyi doesn't have lots of toys. (Since this has been explained Moses has also been praying for his toys at night. I think he might be a little nervous.) I don't want our family to appear holier than thou so I must admit that we have also pulled the "What do you think Kenyi is eating for dinner?" card when Moses has balked at his dinner plate. Just keepin' it real with you folks.

I really want to challenge you; if you are not sponsoring a child to pray about what is standing in your way. You really don't need to pray about whether or not you should be caring for orphans. Gods word is clear on that one. You should. (and maybe you are in some other way)

What are you clinging to that He is calling you to give up for the one of the "least of these"?

A couple latte's each week?

Your data package?

Another pair of shoes?

Pray for God to reveal what is standing in your way and to help you respond in faithful obedience. You will be blessed beyond belief. And so will an orphan.

statistics make us numb (see video to the right)

I think, for the most part, this is true. Statistics make us numb. We feel powerless, helpless against such massive numbers. In the context of orphan care, REALLY massive numbers are thrown around. Since I'm a numbers geek, I want to know them and understand them and share them. I know, you can't wait.

The really exciting thing about statistics, is that they are not outside the control of God. He laughs in the face of statistics. Just ask the person who was cured of cancer or the couple who was told they could never conceive (and now have five bio kids). Statistics are nothing to the God of the universe. Mark Twain also had something to say about statistics: "'There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."

There are some confusing numbers out there with regards to "orphans". According to UNICEF there are 163 million "orphans" worldwide. Most of us, when we think of the term "orphan", think of children without parents. But that is not the case. UNICEF and other agencies "adopted the broader definition of orphan in the mid-1990s as the AIDS pandemic began leading to the death of millions of parents worldwide, leaving an ever increasing number of children growing up without one or more parents. So the terminology of a ‘single orphan’ – the loss of one parent – and a ‘double orphan’ – the loss of both parents – was born to convey this growing crisis."

So the number of vulnerable children worldwide is estimated to be 163 million. Some of these children have two living parents but are highly vulnerable because the parents are not able to afford their care, abuse them, neglect them, are very ill... There are as many reasons why children are vulnerable as there are vulnerable children. It's complex. I can hardly begin to grasp it.

Of those 163 million vulnerable children, 55.3 million are without a mother and 126 million are without a father. Only 18.3 million are "double orphans". I say only because, if we just looked at the 163, it would be our assumption that homes are needed for all of those children, but that is not the case. 90% of those children have homes and living family members. Their entire family needs support and love and prayer. (and sponsorships - more on that next time)

While we're on the subject of statistics, I want to bring it home to Kentucky. According to Focus on the Family, in 2009, there were 2,048 children in foster care waiting for forever families. There were also, according to Focus on the Family in 2009, 6,859 churches in the state of Kentucky. WOW. 2,048 kids ready for homes and 6,859 churches. Really WOW.

To quote Dan Cruver from Together for Adoption "Can you think of a better visible testimony to a watching world of what God has done for us in Christ than caring for orphans in their need and helplessness?"

I can't. How about you?
Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow. - Isaiah 1:17

Refocus

I have thought about the blog quite a bit these past few months. Although thinking about it hasn't led to any telepathic posts... Aside from the fact that life moves at light speed, I've struggled with the question "What is our blog about?" More importantly, what are we about? (it ain't cancer folks!) We've been talking and praying and searching and reading. What are we, the Wallace's, about?

There are lots of things to blog about - meal planning, being frugal, being "green", film making, parenthood, marriage... We read blogs about all of these things. But what is the word from the Wallace's?

It's slowly become clear, that we are about orphans. We're about orphans not because it's trendy or heroic or because they're cute. We're about orphans because our God is about orphans.We're about orphans because he has given us a heart and a mandate to love and care for them.

He tells us so in James chapter 1 verse 27 - "Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world." Pure and undefiled. TRUE. True religion is to care for orphans. Not super religion or hero religion or varsity religion. True religion. It is a central, integral, essential part of being a Christ follower to care for orphans and widows.

So what does that mean? What does it look like when you don't feel called to sell everything you have,move to Africa and start an orphanage? We are slowly figuring it out.

For us, the first step was to start the adoption process, so one focus of this blog will continue to be adoption. We want to be and provide resources for families interested in adoptions and foster care. We want to encourage them and pray for them and support them in any way we can.

BUT, there is so much more to James 1:27 than adoption. We are just starting to unpack it. And as we do, I will be blogging about it. I promise. My hope and prayer in redirecting the focus of our blog is that the Holy Spirit would stir in your hearts the same conviction and desire to care for orphans that He has stirred in ours.

And when I say we, I mean WE. For me, I have never felt surer of anything in my life than I do that this is my purpose for His kingdom. And when William and I came up with the Top Five Focuses of our family, my sweet husband listed orphans as #3 after God (#1) and our family (#2).

Moses is the most vocal about his love for the orphans. (anyone surprised? Moses, vocal?) Since taking a trip to Target to buy needed items for his "friends" at Harvester's Reaching the Nations (HRTN), packing them up and taking them to the post office, the kid cannot stop talking about his friends in Sudan. We've also started sponsoring a boy from HRTN and Moses talks about him. Daily. He also asks at least once a day "When are we going to Sudan?"

Meadow has yet to show us in what way she will care for the orphans but some of the focuses here will be how to care for orphans as a family and raising kiddos with a heart for orphans.

I'll also be blogging about the theology of orphan care, suffering and God's sovereignty, organizations that are doing orphan care well (and how you can support them) and life and how we are living it.

We'll also be including resources for the different areas of "orphan care" - adoption and funding, foster care, human trafficking, orphan sponsorships and more.

I'm hopefull and encouraged by what the Holy Spirit will do through all of you who will be following along.