October Martini

If you're new here you can read about the monthly martini's here. As I said, it's basically a way for me to show off my super cute kids and rejoice in all the blessings of the past month. There are quite a few pics from October - enjoy!

We had five jewelry parties in October. (and one in September) Each one was a success! Five more to go and then I'll do a post about the do's and don't of using rolled paper bead jewelry as a fundraiser.

Seriously love our neighborhood this time of year. Not sure I could live without the change of seasons!

Meadow enjoying her hot coco at Sunergos.

 

My little girl thinks she is SO BIG.

And this guy. Man is he cute!

Picking pumpkins with Mimi, Grandpa, Uncle Dave, Aunt Emmie and Baby Otto.

Meadow loves her Mimi.

The cousins.

Our first year at the Zoo Halloween party.

 Wow. How did this happen? 

Picking Papa up at work.

Not sleeping.

Seriously cute jewelry models

Wish I had one with all three of them in focus!

My robots.

Happy Halloween!

T-shirt Sale!

Our t-shirts are now on sale! Adult shirts are $20 and kids shirts are $10. We're getting low on certain sizes/colors so comment on your preference and I'll check to see if it's available. Get one before they are gone! Gift one to someone who has complimented on yours!

Shameless Plug

We are still plugging away on raising funds to bring our boy home. In addition to the shirts we have here, there are jewelry, ornaments and wreaths available on etsy and Facebook. Take a look!

Christmas is a comin' and these items make wonderful gifts for family and friends - adopting or not.

Pics of some of the items are below. Please share our etsy and Facebook pages with everyone you know, inlcuding total strangers you do not yet know. It takes a village people!

Adoption Update: A Detour Through Ethiopia

I'm not sure how to start this post. It's one of those posts that as "prospective adoptive parents", you never want to write. (I hate that term, by the way - are you any less "real" parents than a pregnant couple? You wouldn't refer to a pregnant women as a "prospective mom" would you?)

Yesterday, Ethiopia denied our case.

We cannot appeal.

Our son is not in Ethiopia.

As I write those words tears swell up in my eyes. How could we have been so sure and been so wrong? I do not know. Sometimes when I ponder that question I become frightened by it.

I do know that one day it will all make sense, that God is faithful and that we are being obedient to His calling on our lives. But oh how frightening that can be some days. Trusting in faith can feel both scary and secure.

I'm thankful that William has been a rock during this difficult day and a half. When I called him to tell him the news, I explained that our agency suggested we consider the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) program. Without hesitation he said "Call the Congo Lady." (there is a program director for each country, so the Congo program director is, in our house, "the Congo Lady") His conviction over our direction is so strong that the 2 1/2 year $10,000 detour through Ethiopia didn't phase him a bit. I however, wondered around the house aimlessly in my pajamas all afternoon.

My mind has raced with thoughts. I've emailed practically everyone I know in the adoption world to get their advice and feedback. I've googled. I've called. I've questioned. I've prayed, but not nearly enough.

I've thought about the fact that cancer exists because we live in a sinful fallen world. And orphans exist because we live in a sinful fallen world. And these two symptoms of sin are colliding in our world in such a perplexing way.

My heart breaks for the children in Ethiopia, who will wait on the streets or in orphanages for longer - possibly forever - because cancer survivors or parents with heart conditions or a history of depression or kidney problems, are deemed unfit to parent them.

It makes me angry.

And then I remember that nothing comes into my life that has not passed through the hands of my Father in heaven. And that He loves the children in Ethiopia far more than I ever could. And it drives me to my knees.

So, as William advised, I called the Congo Lady. She gave me the basic lowdown on the DRC program. In some ways, it sounds very similar to the way the Ethiopia program did 4 years ago when we picked it. They have fairly reasonable restrictions and none of them have to do with being a cancer survivor. Last night I stayed up way to late reading about the DRC, agencies that have programs in that country, reading blogs of people who have/are adopting from there... Today I called the Congo lady back and drilled her pretty good. Since I've been in this international adoption world for a while now and my emotions are a little, shall we say, raw right now, I asked her the hard questions and then I questioned her answers. She passed the drilling.

I still can't believe that after this long I am researching agencies and countries. But. Here. We. Are.

At this point, we are 90% sure that we will transfer to the DRC program. Once we decide, I will do a post on the program and the differences between it and Ethiopia. There are many.

One of my hesitations, is that I feel a little guilty about switching countries so quickly. And that before yesterday I knew practically NOTHING about the DRC. I knew nothing about the country, the kids, where they come from and why, what they have experienced, their culture, their language and religion - I didn't even know the capital. Sure I can learn, but I feel almost like we are using them, and their poverty and third world situation, to get a kid. And while we love our son already, wherever he is, I feel guilty about moving on so quickly. About not spending more time grieving over the loss of Ethiopia in our lives.

I've even wondered, and a few people have likened our experience to having a miscarriage, did we have a son in Ethiopia 3 years ago or 2 years ago or 1 year ago? Did we? I'm not sure that's a healthy path for my mind to take and I don't want to make light of what experiencing a miscarriage must feel like. But I feel a loss and feel the need to grieve it. Whether there was ever a living breathing Ethiopian boy meant for us I will never know.

Safe Families

I've been wanting to do this post for a while now. I learned about this wonderful program - "Safe Families" - from the Louisville based Orphan Care Alliance. Since you can visit the Safe Families website and get all the info you want, it seems futile to write an entire post about it... Although I could because it is THAT amazing.

A couple things about Safe Families that I really want to point out is that it is voluntary and supplemental to the care the parents are providing. It is not mandated by the state - the parents choose to seek a Safe Family for their kids before their situation (addiction, jail time, homelessness, job loss, etc.) escalates to the point that child protective services becomes involved. It keeps kids out of an already overtaxed and underfunded foster care system, provides them with a safe Christian home and allows their parents to take care of some adult business.

Below is an overivew of the program (and some interesting tidbits I pulled from their website and a video for you visual types). Don't take it from me, check it out! It really is amazing and there is a Louisville chapter in the works as we speak! So pumped about that!

When crisis strikes, many of us rely on relatives and our church family for support. But for some parents, there isn't a safety net. Often problems such as drug addiction, domestic abuse, incarceration, or illness can be debilitating, making it impossible for parents to care for their children. With the changing economy many more families are experiencing financial crisis, unemployment, and homelessness. During such crisis, children are especially at-risk for neglect or abuse as their parents struggle to cope with crushing circumstances and emotions.

Currently, 85% of all families in the project come back together, often in the most stable environment they’ve ever known.

The average length of stay is about six weeks, but placements usually last from two days to a year.

While the Safe Family for Children Project can provide placements for newborns through adolescents (0-18), there will be a concentration on the younger and most vulnerable children (ages 0-6).

For those opening their home to a child the process would include an application, a home visit, ongoing training, and a background check and fingerprinting. In total, you can expect the process to take about 2 months before you would be contacted and a child could be placed in your care.

You can "Like" their facebook page to see some of the amazing things God is doing through this organization.

Did I mention that it is uh-may-zing?!