I am finally
getting a few quiet moments to myself to share some thoughts from the
Created for Care retreat.
Oh how
wonderful it was!
I’m hoping
and praying that the lessons learned will seep into my life and pour over into
this online space for weeks and months and years to come.
It meant so
much to me personally to attend the retreat. For one, it was in March which marked
three years of being “in the process”. I expected March to be difficult and anticipated
the retreat with a heavy heart.
I also
discovered, exactly one week before I left town, that I would return to an
increased level of craziness at our house and that if I was going to get sleep
or rest any time soon, it needed to happen before coming home. So one dark and rainy morning, a few friends
and I headed south to Lake Lanier.
There is
something special and kindred about being with other mamas whose babies
came/will come from someone else’s womb. Sharing the stories, the heartbreak,
God’s incredible provision and timing through it all. It is therapeutic.
It’s also hard for those of us whose stories
take longer than others. Whose stories
don’t yet have a happy ending. At times, I felt jealous and bitter. Prideful
and judgmental.
I am thankful that God delivered me from those
feelings and allowed me to embrace and celebrate with the lovely ladies who
shared stories and pictures of the children God has grafted into their
families.
Overall, the
retreat was an emotional and insightful whirlwind. The schedule was FULL from waking
to sleeping. I cried a LOT. I have yet
to make it through all any of the notes that I took. It will take me months to
implement what I gleaned into the way I support my husband, parent my kids and
care for orphans.
The weekend
at Lake Lanier was just the tip of the iceberg of what I can learn from these
ladies. I’m looking forward to attending Created for Care for years to come and
already anticipate the wonderful teaching it will bring.
There were
plenty of “ah-ha” moments over the three day weekend, but today I want to share
something said in passing, not from a
stage or from someone with a microphone. In the midst of conversation, someone commented
“That’s what adoption blogs are for – people are just venting their
frustrations.”
That
comment, while not meant for me, felt like darts flying onto my forehead landing in big
black letters - “VENTING FRUSTRATIONS”.
When we switched the focus of this blog, my
intention was not to be another adoption blog. Adoption blogs are great but we felt very surely and strongly that God had given us our journey,
including all of the painful waiting and nuances, so that we could encourage
and equip others to care for orphans. Not whine about our waiting.
But for the
past six months, there’s been a lot of venting my frustrations and whining going
on around here…
Now I know
that sharing our story openly and honestly is encouraging to some, and that
being transparent about the hard parts of orphan care is a good thing. I
believe that. BUT, I don’t know that a casual passer-by would scan my recent
posts and think – “I need to care for orphans and this girl has some great
practical ideas and encouragement for how to do that!”
We don’t
know what the Lord has in store for our personal orphan care journey but we believe that caring for orphans is a biblical command for all believers,
not a calling for some. We believe that God has called our family to this task
of encouraging and equipping others and we want to be faithful to pursue it.
So, I’m
resolving to vent less and encourage and equip more. Don’t get me wrong, I’m
still frustrated, there will still be venting, just more encouraging and
equipping to go along with it! I hope you'll keep visiting and feel encouraged and equipped to care for orphans, whatever that may look like for you!
