waiting: month three

This waiting, it sucks. 

You're shocked I know.

But here's the thing about waiting for three plus years - sometimes your pride tricks you into thinking you've actually gotten good at it. Like you've conquered it and are so content and experienced at it you've got it under control.

Then you get smacked upside the head with what seems like an impossible weight of waiting you can't possibly live through. For us, that smack came last week when we learned we are still 12 or so months away from bringing "J" home.

And here's the thing about that weight - we can't carry it. We must wait on the Lord. Not in a cheesy just stand on the sidelines and pick daisies all day while something in the Heavens magically comes together.

We have to wait on Him. Lean on Him. Ugly cry out to Him.Get on our knees before Him.Give it all over to Him.

Only when I am crushed by God, do I truly wait on Him. It's sad but true. My humanness can't do it otherwise.

So here we are: crushed and waiting. Thankful that He's got this. He's not finished writing this story, it's just going to take a little longer than we thought it would. Like three years longer. But who's counting?

p.s. For those of you who are reading because you're in the DRC process and care about the logistics - there were more errors found on our Consent to Adopt and our attorney was robbed at gunpoint. He lost his cell phone, computer and passport. (he was out of country) Therefore, we don't know if the Consent to Adopt has been signed by the mayor yet or not.

The reason for the additional wait is because we have an amazing agency who cares about the children of the DRC - ALL of them, not just the ones who can be adopted, and is working hard to build a relationship with the government officials instead of working around them. Building relationships takes time but they are committed long term to the care of the vulnerable children of the DRC.